A Series of Infomercial Failures
Personal Policy #17: Disinterestedness
If you make something for the Internet and DON'T get any hate mail, you made something really boring.
Personal Policy #17: Office
Remember, nothing fun has ever happened inside of Microsoft Word.
Personal Policy #16: Panic
Go for it!
Personal Policy #15: Bad time
It is OK if something bad happens to you as long as the experience makes for an entertaining enough story.
Personal Policy #14: Prevention
Do not eat more than one half of any pizza*.
*This does not apply to personal class pizzas.
Personal Policy #13: Bad news
Try to be sensitive when you tell someone that their boyfriend is secretly an international terrorist responsible for death of dozens of Americans.
Personal Policy #12: Meta-policy
Personal policies regulating caffeine consumption at work are doomed to failure.
Personal Policy #11: Valentine's Day
Remember that neglecting fake holidays can have real consequences.
Personal Policy #10: Traffic
Do not follow the siren call of lane splitting.
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